By Craig Gross
About This Episode
When I go to speak at events, I get this question during the Q&A just about every time. Basically the question is always some form of, “why are you picking on porn? What’s the big deal?” And I’ll usually laugh and say, “I wouldn’t have the job I have of helping people if porn really wasn’t a big deal.”
If pornography was just fun and games, just harmless entertainment, and it benefited people, then I would have moved on like 17 years ago. It is not just harmless entertainment. You watch pornography and you get ideas for sex.
My son’s not going to come home from a Spider-Man movie and think he’s going to climb walls. You know why? Because he knows that’s fake. When you watch porn you think it’s real because those are things you could do.
But what I’m saying is the sex that they’re portraying is not setting you up for success with sex down the road now. And that doesn’t have anything to do with the Bible, that’s just common knowledge. When men and women, and especially younger kids who are just figuring out what sex is, see those sex scenes they think, “Oh, that’s what sex is and I need to do it that way.”
Porn shows so many other options that now you’re not satisfied with your missionary position. It doesn’t live up to what you’ve just watched in that video.
The problem with porn is you’re watching something and you assume because they’re doing an act that we’re going to do now or we’re going to do one day that this is what people like.
Religious or not religious, I think when you start watching porn, you’re gonna be disappointed with real sex and you would rather have porn than sex. Porn is selling you a cheap substitute for real sex and real intimacy. And that’s a disservice to you and your spouse.
Be careful, especially if you’re a kid or you’re not married yet and you start viewing porn. The lie is that one day you will stop when you get married. You’re going to keep going back to something because it’s easy, it’s a habit and you’re used to it. And then the other thing is going to disappoint you.
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Our Favorite Quotes From This Episode
- I wouldn’t have the job I have of helping people if porn really wasn’t a big deal.
- If pornography was just fun and games and it was just harmless entertainment and it benefited people, then I would have moved on like 17 years ago.
- Porn is not just entertainment.
- Porn is not setting you up for success with sex down the road.
- You want sex. Porn is going to give it to you with butter, with peanut butter and with syrup, like all those things. And you’re going back to your bedroom with your one light on in your missionary position sex and it doesn’t live up to what you just watched in that video.
- My kids don’t think they’re superheroes. They know what they’re watching isn’t real. The problem with porn is you assume you’re going to do it and that that’s what people like.
- I think when you start watching porn, you’re gonna be disappointed with real sex and you would rather have porn than sex and that’s a disservice.
- Porn is like saying you’d rather go to McDonald’s than Ruth’s Chris. Yeah, McDonald’s is faster and it’s cheaper, but it’s nowhere near the same quality that you’re going to get at a steakhouse. Porn is like fast food. It’s cheap, it’s fast, it’s niche, it’s what you want. It’s a cheap substitute.
- The other lie is that one day you will stop when you get married. That you’ll stop going to McDonald’s just because you can eat at Ruth’s Chris. But you’re going to keep going back to something because it’s a habit and it’s easy.
- If you believe the Bible, the Bible says to not even look at a woman with lust in your eyes. I don’t see how you’re able to do that with you’re looking at porn. You’re taking your eyes off of your wife and onto somebody else. I don’t see how that’s a good thing.
- Porn is going to disappoint you. If I had grown up in this porn generation where I’ve finally have sex with somebody and if I’m disappointed because it doesn’t match what I thought based on these videos, that’s just got to suck. And I know that’s happening for so many people. Man, remove it out of your life, get rid of it.